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Nick Schmidt

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Nick Schmidt

THE INBETWEENERS MOVIE (2011)

Edit item Friday, 17 January 2014 07:00

 

The Buzz:

     This is the follow-up film to the widely successful British TV series, which followed four friends through their equivalent of High School.  If you are asking yourself why the series didn’t just continue, remember that British television shows for the most part are designed to end.  That is one major reason that adaptations of these series have rarely worked in America as we run our shows till there is only one remaining original cast member and all the humor is gone.  The show was great for its brutal honesty with how awkward and aggressively horny teenagers are, but also showing how stupid they are.  The film brings back all important cast members and starts out with their graduation and release to summer holidays.  What follows is the vacation that we all thought about having, and when we finally went fell to shit in the most glorious fashion.

 

 

 

 

APOLLO 18 (2011)

Edit item Friday, 10 January 2014 12:00

The Buzz:

     So I evidently have a burning desire to see every found footage style film available on Netflix, and this one was a recent update to the site.  The main difference with this particular film is that I actually remember hearing about it and seeing commercials; most of these types of movies do not get press.  This film hypothesizes that Apollo 17 was not the last trip we took to the moon, that there was one in secret that ended poorly to say the least.  To give an idea of what to expect the tag line is, “There’s a reason we didn’t go back”, and the reason evidently was because 90 minutes feels like an eternity there.  Without further delay I present to you my latest in my increasing obsession, maybe fetish with found footage, enjoy and remember not to go to the moon.

 

 

 

 

 

The Buzz:

     Every culture has a slightly different version of the Santa Claus story, for instance in America it is simply a fat Tim Allen that has many memorable Christmas adventures.  In other cultures Santa was an incarnation of a real person such as St. Nikolas in Germany and he even travels with an assistant Black Peter.  In this Finnish fantasy/horror film they go with the OLD Santa Claus story, where Santa was a demon of sorts that would take children that were “naughty” and devour them.  On the surface that sounds like a pretty awesome concept for a story….because it is!  So sit back and enjoy this Christmas tale and remember….Santa’s always watching…always…

 

 

 

 

 

YELLOWBRICKROAD (2010)

Edit item Friday, 20 December 2013 07:44

The Buzz:

     Have you ever read one of those synopses on Netflix that sounded so freaking amazing and wonderful that you had to see it that instant?  I was recently tricked into this exact situation by the malevolent gods that control that great movie catalog in the sky.   The film was based on an entire town of people just standing up one day and walking into the woods in 1940.  The town numbered slightly over 500 and after a few days law enforcement went down the path and found over 300 people either frozen or horribly mutilated.  Everything was swept under the rug until the Freedom of Information Act allowed some documentarians to get access to the files and this is their journey.  Sounds like an interesting premise right?  Unfortunately that is on the title card that begins the film; below I will discuss what followed.

 

 

 

THE BAY (2012)

Edit item Friday, 20 December 2013 07:26

The Buzz:

     Growing up on the Eastern Shore of Maryland was a unique experience for a young kid; it was boring, but at least there was nothing to do.  This part of Maryland is very different than what most people picture of the state; it is mainly farmland and wetlands.  One of the biggest threats to the way of life there is ecological, because the economy thrives on healthy water.  This film tackles this huge fear in a very plausible and quasi-scientific way.  This is another found footage style film, which seems to be a kick that I am on.  It’s horror in some ways, but it doesn’t really fit any genre 100%.  If you have an hour and a half to kill and want a good way to make the clock speed on, give this film a shot.

 

 

 

 

 

MANIAC (2012)

Edit item Friday, 13 December 2013 12:00

The Buzz:

     Shock horror pretty much died in the 80’s, or I should say shock horror of any decent quality at least.  One of the most shocking and disturbing films from that genre is one of Tom Savini’s  greatest works, a little film starring Joe Spinelli called Maniac.  I only discovered recently that one of the most detested films of all time was remade in 2012; basically the same movie with new faces.  Having seen the original and felt dirty for years after doing so, I made the brilliant decision that I gotta watch this one too.  I am glad I did!  I was treated to a well-acted piece of modern shock horror that all fans should see.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grave Encounters 2 (2012)

Edit item Friday, 06 December 2013 12:00

The Buzz:

     This is another found footage film from The Vicious Brothers, and set ten years after the original film.  This is a little different of a take on the ghost horror genre because in this case the film is literally going all Meta and basing itself on another found footage film.  There are certainly more scares in this installment as they try to address the main issue in the series, but the story is still pretty solid.  The movie even starts with vlogs reviewing the first film on YouTube and one of the reviewers turns out to be the main character.  If you are a fan of the found footage genre you should definitely give this film a shot like I did, you won’t regret it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grave Encounters (2011)

Edit item Friday, 06 December 2013 12:00

The Buzz:

     You know all those crappy haunting shows?  What if they were in fact real and came across a true haunted place?  This is the premise of Grave Encounters.  The film is introduced as a found footage compilation by the producer who says it’s from a TV show of the same name.  What we get is a behind the scenes filming of the show as well as a partially finished episode.  When things start to go to hell, like they do, we get to see the various fates of the characters from their point of view.  If you can deal with a “shaky-cam” film, this has a lot to offer and is quite well crafted.

 

 

 

 

 

V/H/S (2012)

Edit item Friday, 22 November 2013 07:37

The Buzz:

     This film is technically the first in a series with the sequel V/H/S 2, which has already been reviewed on our site.  The film is basically a montage of short films bracketed by a story that is supposed to explain why these tapes are being watched.  So it is hard to take this film and talk about it as a whole, but we can give it a shot.  If you have a thing for sci-fi and horror but a short attention span, this may very well be your cup of tea.

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THE SECRET OF NIMH (1982)

Edit item Friday, 06 September 2013 00:42

The Buzz:

     As I have mentioned before, there was a lack of well-made animation in the early to late 80’s, as the Disney Empire was crumbling under the iron thumb of Michael Eisner and there were virtually no other Americans in the medium.  That is until two lone animators broke off from Disney and decided to create their own studio, based purely off the success of a made-for-TV animation called Banjo: The Woodpile Cat and a hand animated arcade game known as Dragon’s Lair.  They got their funding and released their first full-length picture based off a little-known children’s book.  The film was not a commercial success, but at least for me it is a cult classic and my favorite film of all time.  I give you The Secret of NIMH.

 

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About Us

Tanked Matinee is the place to go for good drinking movies. What do we mean by that? Simply speaking, we evaluate and recommend entertainment media based on how much fun it is to watch with friends on the sofa and a cold beer in hand.

Everyone knows "The Godfather" is a great movie, but is it as great to drink with as "Roadhouse?" We can appreciate "Citizen Kane" as a masterpiece of cinema, but is it as good a centerpiece for your party as "Santa Clause Conquers the Martians?"

Tanked Matinee appreciates film as art, but when you're kicking back on Friday night with a tall Rum & Coke, you're not looking for art, man, you want to be entertained. We're here to recommend the best movies for your night in, whether it's a big party, small get-together, or just a quiet night alone with a bottle of wine or three.

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